Author: Pete

That was cool as hell.

Page 55, Game 10: David by Fermenter

All I knew about this game was that it was named “David.” Based on that, I literally had no idea what was waiting for me. Some sort of interactive fiction piece, perhaps? A one-page RPG following the adventures of the most maligned of the GUYS (you know … GUYS?), Dave Guy? A picture of my friend Dave?

I was not expecting “Abstract physics-based boss fighter where you, a hollow square, battle the forces of evil.”

But that’s what I got. And it was honestly pretty sweet.

As a hollow square, you will battle sins like “Greed,” “Anger,” “Lies,” or “Wolf.” These sins will be represented as a variety of shapes that will try to swarm you. You will hop around in an environment where gravity exists, but you can ignore it if you jump hard enough. To fight back, you hold down the mouse button on your halo to charge, then mouse-over to your target and release in order to blast them.

To get to the big boss battle, you must defeat all the sins on “Hard” mode. Which is exactly the same as “Easy,” except instead of seven hit points, you have one.

The reward for defeating all the sins on “Easy” is the satisfaction of a job well done.

I do not think I will be proceeding to the big boss battle.

But this is, nevertheless, a cool, inventive, satisfying little game. Each battle is unique, and each one will require you to come up with a new strategy to beat the baddie. Getting the mouse over my geometric avatar to begin the weapon charge was a bit more fiddly than I preferred, but I suppose that’s part of the challenge of the game, really.

This is a fun, weird little game. I can definitely recommend it.

That’ll be it for tonight. But what awaits me tomorrow?

Page 5, Game 30: Gun Rounds by Blabberf

“Fast paced, turn-based shooter with a cute attitude!”

Promising. Very promising.

AW YEAH ENOUGH ART LET’S BLOW SOME SHIT UP WOOOOOOO

Page 41, Game 2: Clouds of Fire: Blazing Skies by AaronMakesGames

Aw, man. I was super primed to love this.

It’s a 1942-style vertical scroller where you fly your plane around and SHOOT THE FUCK OUTTA EVERYTHING YEAAAAAAAAH, but with roguelike elements mixed in. Every component of this game excites me and makes me want to like it.

Unfortunately, I really don’t. One of the core elements of a game like 1942 is the way you buzz around the screen laying down UNENDING TORRENTS OF BLAZING DEATH GUNFIRE COME GET SOME!!!!!!, but Clouds of Fire makes the crucial mistake of giving all its mooks hit points. I took me a little while before I was even certain that I WAS actually hitting anything; I was, but I wasn’t hitting it hard enough to kill it. I had to hit even ordinary foes multiple times to bring them down. Apparently, the ability to one-shot mooks is a power one must earn the right to unlock in Clouds of Fire.

No. No, no, no. Hit points are for sub-bosses and big bads. The hordes of foes I encounter along the way should do me the courtesy of exploding when I dart in and shoot them, not no-selling the hit and forcing me to shoot again. And again. And, dammit, maybe this one will– THERE he goes, brought him down. Finally.

The presentation is a bit crude and raw, and I’m not at all certain I understood the overall flow of the game or the choices being presented to me. None of that would matter if the core gameplay was satisfying, and this just isn’t.

This is one where if, a few years from now, a friend was all “Dude, have you tried Clouds of Fire? It’s great!”, I’d be like “Cool, the dev must have sorted out the issues” and give it another try. Gladly. It’s easy to imagine a version of this game that’s an adrenaline-packed blast. Sadly, this version is not that game.

Perhaps the next one will be better?

Page 55, Game 10: David by Fermenter

No stub description.

Okay, cool. I’ll embrace the mystery. Dave Guy!

Presentation matters.

Page 28, Game 25: Sundown by L A Wilga

This is another one where I have to engage the ol’ snark muffler; someone clearly put a crapload of work into this, and the only reason it’s in front of me now is that they effectively donated it to a charitable fundraiser.

But man, there are definitely some issues here.

This is a tabletop RPG, set in an original science fantasy world. When I first cracked-open the PDF, I was all “Whoa, 260 pages? I think I stumbled into another professional-grade product here.” But the layout of the book quickly convinced me otherwise.

The rules don’t sell the game. The contents of the book look drab and unimaginative; it’s just a single column of Header/Textblock over and over again, broken up by the occasional illustration. There isn’t even any effort made to include section information in the page headers or footers, which makes it tough to tell precisely where in the book you are.

What’s more, the rulebook is incomplete; the “Dossier” (character sheet) and “Questionnaire” (something about defining the setting?) aren’t included, and are only available as separate downloads off of the website.

I feel like for games like this where I’m looking at them but don’t think I’ll actually get the chance to play, the big question is, “Do these rules entice me into wanting to play the game they represent?” And for Sundown, the answer is “No.” It just looks drab and frustrating; I’m not confident I’ll be able to easily find whatever it is I want to know, whether it’s the steps in character creation or information about the setting or rules for actual gameplay.

I recognize my non-play “readthroughs” are for the tabletop material are inherently unfair; it’s entirely possible that if I sat at a table from somebody who was really passionate about the setting and the ruleset, the ensuing experience would be dope as fuck. Surely the game designers have that passion. Unfortunately, none of that passion made it into the rulebook.

Entice me, Sundown. Why should I spend my finite time playing you instead of some other game? It’s not a rhetorical question.

Maybe the next game will be more alluring?

Page 41, Game 2: Clouds of Fire: Blazing Skies by AaronMakesGames

“Complete Chaos in this Shoot-em up meets Rouge-like with Physics!”

So, it’s either gonna be awesome or a howling clusterfuck. Let’s see which!

Back to the realm of tabletop RPGs we go!

Page 9, Game 11: Agents of the O.D.D. by Jason Tocci

Players represent agents of a shadowy government(?) agency protecting the world against the supernatural. The game is meant to play fast, with a high player mortality rate. Fully half the rulebook is devoted to a d100 chart containing all the archetypes available for play — or you can just make up some new mook, why not, whatever. Roll some dice to determine your stats, and you’re back in the game!

For a small RPG, this seems pretty firmly middle-of-the-road in terms of the amount of thought that went into it. It’s not the most fully fleshed-out game I’ve encountered in this trawl, but at the same time, it’s not just a tossed-off one day project, either. Even has an example adventure at the end to take some of the weight off the GM’s shoulders for that first run-through.

It’s not dazzling me, but this is totally, like, a Real Game and shit. I’d play it. Why not? The potential for Fun definitely exists here.

But does it exist for the next game?

Which is:

Page 28, Game 25: Sundown by L A Wilga

“Cyberpunk goes Wild West in this transhumanist science fantasy frontier.”

Cyberpunk cowboys, eh? So, Westworld?

Actually, Westworld with a coherent story and a GM/Director who wasn’t intent on constantly pulling surprises out of their ass would be a really cool setting.

Okay, let’s keep my expectations reasonable. It’s a visual novel, not a game-game. Let’s not get grumpy if there aren’t a lot of decisions to be made.

Page 53, Game 4: as long as we’re together: magical girls sweet & pure by cloverfirefly

Right, mostly just clicking to advance the dialog. No problem.

Illustrations are cute, getting the job done here. Hey, looks like we’re in-media-res here! The one magical girl is getting attacked by her best friend magical girl; must be some sorta evil mind-control thing. Good choice, author, start with some interesting shit.

Okay, we’ve got some dialog, some sorta floating magic pet guy, oh, hey, a choice! How did we meet? I have to choose a card without knowing what they mean. Cool, I’m feeling it.

Right, so that’s how we met, that’s what happened when we hung out at the amusement park, that’s the time you helped me find my cat….

Dope, the main characters are all introduced. This is a solid start to the story, I’m into it. Let’s see what kind of cool magical girl adventures we’re about to go–

Game over.

…

…

…

‘Kay.

On deck: Page 9, Game 11: Agents of the O.D.D. by Jason Tocci

“Paranormal investigators of the paranormal”

Really hoping that phrasing is a deliberate choice, and that the next game is not by Perd Hapley.

Page 2, Game 29: Dujanah by jackspinoza

Multicolored rainbow static. Images of an old-style VIC-20/C64 interface admonishing me to load the tape. Messages saying the tape is loading.

The rainbow static returns. A video of a man with a UK accent (Scottish?) appears and tells me this is a randomized video, and that I am in for a treat, as he is about to tell me what the game is about: catharsis.

Interior, a house, rendered in an isometric claymation-esque style. A family of three. The father is shadowy. The mother and daughter wear what might be burkas. I am the mother. When I speak to the daughter, she asks winsome questions about death, accompanied by a laugh track. I ask the daughter if she’s fed her hamster lately. I check on the hamster.

The hamster is dead.

I am now the father, leading the daughter outside to find a good spot to bury the hamster. When we get far enough away from our house, we find what looks like a good space. Shadowy figures surveil the father and daughter from what appears to be a satellite feed. Crosshairs appear on the father. The shadowy figures discuss what is to be done.

Interior, another house. I am a young woman. I step outside to explore. There is a battlemech parked outside my house. I cannot start it, because I do not have the keys. I begin exploring the tiny village where I live. Eventually, I step out of the village and into the world map.

The village no longer exists. I am on a dirt bike, tearing ass across the desert. I bounce off of trees and mountains. I encounter a thrashing dragon thing and give it a squeeze, obtaining many rewards. I encounter a larger town. I explore. The inhabitants say strange things. I find a house, with a child playing. I approach his toys. I shrink and join them.

I am now a man, as indicated by my tiny claymation penis. I am exploring a land of cream and strawberries; the strawberries are coming along nicely, I think. I enter a brier patch, and hear a story about a lonely ordinary many and a witch. I delve deeper into the land of strawberries and cream. I see many strange creatures. I see them again. And again. I am going in circles. I have no idea where the game wants me to go next. I search, in vain, finding nothing.

The game has become what it absolutely, positively, cannot afford to be:

Boring.

So I quit.

I ponder how to describe the experience of playing this game. I am impressed by the dream-like anti-logic, of the recurring sense that once I leave a place I have left it forever. I am wondering if this is meant as Serious Art, or if this is just one massive piss-take. It seems to have had a lot of effort put into it for a piss-take, but some people have time on their hands.

I decide to transcribe what I recall from the game as I played it, and allow the rest to recede into my subconscious. In years to come, I may stumble back on this article, read it, and remember, saying to myself “Fuck me, I thought I dreamed that.”

And then I rolled-up my next game.

Page 53, Game 4: as long as we’re together: magical girls sweet & pure by cloverfirefly

“magical girls visual novel”

Sounds lovely.

Bah.

Page 39, Game 3: These Lands by JestyJam

VR-only. You can’t do shit with a mouse. Hell, you can’t even quit the game; had to close it down from the task bar.

Looks like a totes professional video game, though. If I ever get a VR rig, I’ll give it a play, why not. But in the meanwhile, I’ll just take the dev’s implicit word for it that without the VR setup, it’s not enough fun to be worth bothering with.

Oh, well. Moving on to:

Page 2, Game 29: Dujanah by jackspinoza

“The cost of seeking impossible goals”

You mean student loans? Nah, probably not.

It’s a game where you’re making a game as you play the game!

So, kinda fuckin’ meta. Also, looks really fun.

Page 57, Game 22: Dragon And Warrior by OrionCanning

You and your buddies (preferably a total of four of you, but there are rules to tweak that) are going to create a JRPG. You know, like a Final Fantasy or a Zelda or something. One of you is the big hero Warrior, and you get to be the protagonist. (For now.) One of you is the Villain, and you’ll be in charge of all the monsters and the Big Bad and other various and sundry obstacles. One of you is the Ally, and will control all those NPCs out to help the Warrior. And one of you is the Treasure, and gets to define the environment.

Draw maps! Define quests! Defeat challenges! Level-up! Get treasure! And switch roles!

That last one is, I think, what pushes this game out of “Okay, I could see this working” and into “Okay, I might actually want to try this.” When you do cool shit through the game (as defined by the other players), you get tokens. Get enough tokens, and you can cash them in to switch roles and become the Warrior yourself.

My operating theory with these kind of free-form games is that whether or not it’s a good experience will always be determined by the other players at the table to one degree or another; no storytelling game can compensate for participants who just don’t give a fuck and would rather be watching some sportsball. However, I feel like the good games lay down a framework in which “fun” is the most likely outcome when you have a set of suitably engaged players, and….

Yeah. Hell yeah. Dragon And Warrior does the work. The ruleset feels a little raw in places, but if you and your buddies dig this style of video game, this gives you the materials to create something unique, memorable, and fun. If a DIY tabletop JRPG sounds like it might be your jam, this is absolutely worth a closer look.

What’s next?

Page 39, Game 3: These Lands by JestyJam

“Where will the Island take you?”

Good question. Let’s hop onto the island and find out!

Of all the formats I thought this game might be presented in, I was not expecting a single “readme.txt” file. So I gotta give it props for that, at the very least.

Page 45, Game 10: find(Humanity) by Arty

You are an angel — except angels are more like “robots.” Humanity has vanished. You and the other players are here to figure out what the hell happened to them and report it back to heaven.

This is a storytelling-style RPG. The ruleset feels less like a “game” to me and more like an idea for a game. Your characters have strict programs that they follow, except you the player are defining those programs on the fly as the game progresses. Deviating from your programming is a big deal, and represents your free will starting to peek through … except given that the gameplay consists of you defining what the programming is as you go, what does that mean, exactly?

I feel like a game that’s about rebelling against a strict structure needs a pretty firm structure in the first place — and like a lot of storytelling-style games, these rules aren’t really that interested in providing it. I think you’re figuring out what you’re rebelling against as you go.

You define the chains that bind you.

Whoa. Maybe this is deeper than I’m giving it credit for.

This feels like most of the light storytelling RPGs I’ve found on this trawl; there’s nothing here that grabs me, but I have no doubt it could be fun with the right people. Just a matter of figuring out who those people are, I suppose.

Speaking of lack of free will, what game am I destined to poke at next?

Page 57, Game 22: Dragon And Warrior by OrionCanning

“A tabletop RPG where you make your own oldschool JRPG world”

Given how much I keep bitching about how little these micro-games do to help you define your world, this one may actually be hitting me at exactly the right time.

Furry time!

Page 53, Game 3: Tales from the Road by iforgotmybrain

This is a browser-based game, where you just read and click. It’s not so much a “game” as “interactive fiction.” Except it isn’t particularly “interactive,” and the “fiction” isn’t terribly compelling.

This is a furry story, so you’re a critter-person (I chose “fox”) rooming with a deer and a German shepherd. You graduated college not long ago, but you’re not sure what the hell you want to do with you life. So, road trip!

Eventually. Theoretically. This game is still apparently in progress, and the author hasn’t gotten as far as the road trip yet.

I’ll refrain from being mean; the author clearly means well, and there’s nothing really upsettingly bad about this project. It’s just that meaningful decision points are few and far between; you can wander around your house, but mostly that’s just clicking until you eventually make the choice that will allow the story to continue. And the story itself….

The author is making the very common newbie mistake of assuming that because THEY find these characters fascinating, you will, too. So the entirety of the game was just establishing the supporting cast. But nothing is actually happening, dammit. There’s just no narrative to invest in. It just feels like a lot of directionless faffing about.

There’s also a soundtrack you can turn on. You don’t have to, but it’s there.

I’m veering towards being mean, aren’t I.

It’s far, far from the worst thing I’ve ever read, but I can’t say as I’d really recommend it, either. Still, I do hope the author can make it into the finished product they have in their head.

What’s next?

Page 45, Game 10: find(Humanity) by Arty

“Explore the notion of free will as an automaton without it.”

No idea what to expect from this one, or even what the medium might be. Let’s find out.